When Your Child is Barely on the Charts

The cool thing about blogging is most of the time y’all just get the overflow of what’s happening in our daily lives – and maybe, just maybe, you’ll relate to it. And know that you’re not alone.

Let’s talk about a somewhat sensitive subject :: Growth Charts and Percentiles.

Gag.

I detest them. Truly, I do. Since my twins were born four years ago, I’ve watched these things like hawks. Especially the first year and a half when we were trying to get my daughter as big as possible for her heart surgery. I tracked everything. And I mean, everything. Meticulously. In a large binder with hole-punched pages. For an entire year. Finally, for the sanity of my household, my a-type personality had to surrender and give it up – but I really never stopped the mental brain game of calculating every portion that went into the twin’s mouths.

My twins were born 4 weeks early, Ryan at 5lbs 2oz and Quinn at 3lbs 13oz {she had a failure to thrive in utero as is common with many heart babies}. So we’ve always been on the small side. And remained there. They are on the charts, but somewhere in the 5th-20th percentile on weight and height for both of them. We call it the “Ryan & Quinn” curve. They’ve never deviated. Never dropped off. Never risen above. They are perfectly proportioned for their body type. That’s just where they are, and likely where they will remain.

Here’s the thing that fires me up. I get comments almost every day {from well-meaning people, I’m sure} about how TINY they are.

“Oh, they are just so small!”

“Really??? They just turned 4? My guy is 3 – look at him!”

“Well, I guess twins are usually really tiny, aren’t they?”

“Do they eat enough?”

No. Just NO. Please don’t go there with me anymore.

We know they are small. We see it every day. And not only are they small, but they are summer babies, so young for their age. Meaning 85% of their preschool class turned four MONTHS before they did. So then the difference was massively pronounced.

Guess what? They don’t know that. Not right now. They are blissfully unaware and happy children. They don’t see height or weight or color of skin. They see kids.

Why can’t we as adults see that? Why must we comment on physical attributes and think it’s okay to make comments to their parents? For some reason, society sees it as acceptable to make comments on a child being small and somehow twisting it so it’s the parent’s fault {or makes them feel even worse because trust – I already feel guilt like I’ve done something wrong or not enough}. I would NEVER dream of making a comment to a parent about a child who looked a little overweight. Never. Neither would you. So why is it okay to talk about stature? I would much rather have strangers and friends alike comment on my child’s behavior, social, or cognitive development. “Gosh, your daughter is just always smiling!” Or, “My goodness, your son is incredibly friendly.” Because they are. They are good kids. They are smart kids. They are athletic kids. They are loving. They love God.

And they are nailing every.single.swinging.milestone in the book.

Just sayin’.

I don’t know how it is where you live, but in my relatively affluent suburb, there seems to be great emphasis on growing ’em big, holding ’em back, so they can be the next football or soccer star. So, so wrong to me. I want my children to be their best – not THE best. And size has nothing to do with it.

I guess I’m emotionally attached to this issue because I grew up {gasp!} not even on the charts until I was 10 or so. Maybe later than that. My “big” growth spurt came in 9th grade when I finally jumped from 4’10 to a whopping 5’1. And while it cannot all be blamed on how tall I stood {for there were some sweet tortoise shell glasses involved}, I was bullied mercilessly throughout my elementary and middle school years.

And I fear that for my children. I fear that we groom our children to look at size as a measure of what someone can accomplish. It’s garbage. Even at barely 5 feet tall, I still went on to play competitive soccer and even played a year of Division 1 ball at LSU. I want my children to know that they can accomplish anything, do anything, be anything without limitations. Isn’t that what we all want for our kids?

But when people {well-meaning} utter comments about their stature, eventually they are going to pick up on it. And it might make them sensitive. Or scared. Or worse – it could put a running message in their head that they are not good enough.

I can only pray that my children ignore the commentary – or perhaps even pray that people will think twice before saying anything. But my real prayer is that my children know that they were wonderfully and fearfully made in God’s image – and that’s what truly counts. {Besides, as I’ve grown up – pun intended – I’ve learned that being small is actually pretty cool. I enjoy my size now and never give it a second thought – well, maybe when I take a picture with my 5’10” BFF. Grin}

Though we may be small, we are mighty! Two smiling children. www.houstonmomsblog.com.

Growth charts? I see you. And I will watch you in case someone starts slipping. But you will not define us.

So what do you think? Are you raising a small child? Do you worry? Do comments hurt you? Am I super sensitive? {BTW – the answer to that one is YES…and I know it.}

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Meagan Clanahan
Meagan is a Dallas native who has lived in the Katy area for over a decade. She kicked a soccer ball all the way to Louisiana to attend college at her family’s alma mater of LSU, where she promptly fell in love with a Texas Aggie in Baton Rouge for an internship. After swimming back to Texas following Hurricane Katrina, Matt and Meagan fell in love with the Houston area and now couldn’t imagine living anywhere else. Following several years of infertility, their miracle twins Ryan and Quinn were born in June of 2010. She believes there is nothing better than a chilled glass of Pinot Grigio, a large Sonic Diet Coke, sushi take-out, Girls Nights Out, and a mindless book to curl up with. Besides playing chauffeur and catering to the whims of her children, Meagan also is the Co-Owner of Houston Moms Blog. You can keep up with Meagan at The Clanahan Fam and on Instagram @meaganclanahan!

44 COMMENTS

  1. I know your pain. My son is four. He was born three weeks early at 6lbs 4oz. At first he took off being in the 90th percentile until he was one then slowly curved down. At two he was at 3 percent. We were asked to have hormone tests. I was terrified. They came back normal. But every time I go to the doctor I have to hear how low he is on the charts. I know he’s low. But isn’t it more important that he is still growing. Making inches every year? Through some research I found that the difference between 3 percent and 90 percent. Is one damn inch. Excuse my language. Do really? One inch is what were worried about? I’m short at 5.3. My mother is 4.11 my brother is 5.4. But my husbands family is tall so he apparently should be too. But… I’m in there what if he got the ‘short’ gene? I don’t care. He’s a loving, happy, and healthy boy that takes care of babies and adopts them as soon as he sees them. Milestones haven’t been a problem. Yes there are so many people that are shocked he’s four. But reall? An inch? That’s a number for the doctor to worry about. I’m just going to raise my son to be healthy and happy. Short or tall he’s my previous don.

    • 1 inch??? I never knew that, Christi! Thank you for sharing! Yes, healthy and happy for all of our littles {and bigs} 🙂

  2. Thank you for this very heartfelt and amazing post. We too have a premie and his birth mom was 4’11 and I am 6’2″. I constantly hear comments about how tiny he is (at 15mo he is .57%) and how when he is older he is going to hate me because he will be so much shorter than I am. I focus on love & happiness and hope something like height will not define him. God has made us each perfect!!! ;-). Love this post!!!!!!

    • WHAT? People say that he’s going to hate you? Please. He will love and respect the momma who has raised him all his life in HIS IMAGE, not theirs. Blessings to you, Momma!

  3. I can absolutely relate to this! My first born daughter wasn’t on the charts for weight for a long time. For height she’s in the 10th percentile. I obsessed over it for so long until one day I saw a shirt that said “I’m not little! I’m fun sized!” So now anyone that says that to us, we graciously respond with that. Right now my 26 pound 3 year old has no clue that she’s little. She is fierce and a force to be reckoned with. But I totally agree that one day she may not own her God given stature like she does right now. I hope a lot of people read this. I’m glad I stumbled upon it.

    • LOVE fun sized! Precious! Thank you for reading, Laura! {P.S. My mom always used to say, “Dynamite comes in small packages.” Always loved that too!}

  4. Omg. I have the opposite issue. My kid is at like 94% for height so I get “oh wow she’s as tall as my 4-5 year old. Better get her in basketball ha ha”. Like it’s so great to have to buy new pants for her every month. Why is commentary needed by non medical professionals? Lets all focus on happy kids and just be quiet.

    • Exactly, Bre. Happy and healthy. Never thought about the whole buying new clothes thing. On my end, we can mostly where our shorts from last summer, especially the ones that have that great hidden button inside the waist 😉

      • I think small kids are cute. I was a small kid and I guess that is where I stand. My kids are tall for their age and people always say they are older. My 5 year old has a friend at our church that is 18 months older and her father always thinks my daughter is the same age. They are the same height. He was recently talking to me about her going into first grade and I was like lets start kindergarten first.

        I always tell my friends with smaller kids that they get more use out of their clothes. My son wore clothes by weeks when he was first born. 3 week=3 month, 6 weeks old= 6 month sizes. He was in 2T by 9 months. He has slowed down some and is actually shorter than his sister was at his age now that he is 3.

        My daughter is tall but skinny so shorts can fit her from one year to the next but her legs are so long they start to look really short. She gets good use out of skirts if they are longer.

  5. I love this!! My little is only 7 months but she’s tiny (in the 12th percentile for weight…) also! I get comments almost daily about her size, am I feeding her enough, should I be giving her formula, etc. So annoying! My sweet girl is happy and healthy and also hitting every milestone (some of them early thank you very much) and my prayer is that eventually, people will stop commenting on her size (or lack there of…which let’s be honest, anytime someone comments on a “negative” its hurtful) and focus on her sweet smile or adorable personality!! High five to you and your littles!

    • High five back at you, Megan! I feel for you – those early months were SO hard and I dreaded almost every single doctor’s appointment {and also prayed that the kids wouldn’t poop before they got weighed, ha!}. I bet she has a most precious smile. Prayers that everyone else will see that and make THAT their comment.

  6. This is not just a problem for children who are on the petite end. People constantly comment about the size of my daughter and expect her to behave as the age they perceive her to be. She is 19 months old but often thought to be 3 based on her height. Obviously, a 19 month old and a 3 year old are no where near alike in behavior/abilities. It is extremely unfair to my daughter to be looked at this way. People in general should stop judging others, period.

    • Absolutely agree, Sara! When I ran this past the HMB team while I was putting it together, several of them reminded me that the street ran both ways – like one mom wanted to put a shirt on her 4 year old that said “I’m just 4!” because everyone expected her child to act like a 6 year old behavior wise. And yes ma’am, we need to stop with the physical judgments altogether. I know I’ve been guilty of it and I definitely want to be more conscious of things that I say, big or small 🙂 Thanks for reading!

  7. I can sympathize with you…It is equally as frustrating when your child (both of my girls) is tall for their age. We get “she’s so big” all the time. It really bothered me when my oldest daughter was a baby. She was a precious, chubby, long girl & when someone asked how old she was & I told them, they would almost always say, “She’s so big!” It made me feel like they thought my child was some kind of freak 🙁 She’s still tall & her 11month old sister is tall also and by the way, their Daddy and Papa are tall too. I love my beautiful, tall, silly girls so, so much!!!

    • Yes, Whitney for sure! We need to be cognizant on all sides that what we say regarding size can flat out HURT, no matter the intention. No child should ever be made to feel like a freak. My hope is that us moms take it harder than the kids, and that maybe, just maybe, they won’t get the spillover. Tall, beautiful and silly sounds like a great combo 🙂

  8. Great post Meagan! I have no idea idea why we as a society are so hung up on size. My son is more on the big side and I get comments from strangers about how big he is for his age…all with a positive, encouraging tone, as if because he is big I’m a really good parent. Let’s not fool ourselves, I may be a good parent, but it has nothing to do with Jack’s size. I’d much rather our children have big, kind hearts than care anything about their size. I could write a whole other post about reaching milestones – something my son is NOT doing with the norm. And even though he’s been to a specialist and everything is good, people love to give me their unsolicited advice on the topic” “give him one weekend with me and I’ll have him walking” or “you are holding him too much” or “it’s because he isn’t in daycare”…wth people! Anyway, thanks for sharing! You have obviously struck a cord with many Houston moms.

    • Thanks so much, Chelsea! The best part about this post has been hearing “the other side” – so refreshing to know that mommas of the bigger kids have the same feelings that I have with my little ones. Ehhh, size. Someone has to round out the percentiles, right? 🙂 And yes, ‘big kind hearts’, should be our number one goal for sure. Maybe you should write that post about milestones??? 😉 I bet it would strike a chord for sure. My son didn’t walk until he was 15 months old and everyone had their thoughts on that…grrrrr. They all do it on their own time. He also didn’t become fully potty trained until right before his 4th birthday, and you know what? That’s ok too. xoxo my friend.

  9. Thank you so much for this post. I know myself and a few of my friends really can relate to this! It breaks my heart that society (and lets be honest…Doctors) judge our children on appearance at such a young age. Both of my kids are happy, healthy and yes, FED, but on the smaller side. One time a woman called by son petite, and Im sure the look on my face (because I didnt have the courage to SPEAK up) could have killed!

    • Ha, Jennifer! I’ve had that look on my face many a time, especially recently. It’s almost like “I dare you to say it again!” 🙂 I wish the standards were just “Hey, they are growing, they are staying on the curve, and btw, hey mom, you’ve done a great job because they are such happy kids!” That would be a GREAT thing to hear. I’m with ya, sister!

  10. Loved this! My oldest is also 4, and last year in PRESCHOOL was already called short! It starts so young! Yes. He is shorter than some, and at 4 he already knows this! My middle child is even smaller! Literally wanted to throw a party when he reached the 10th %! And now my baby is giant! And people are ALWAYS making some comment about at least one of them!

    • Ha! I’m with you on the party thing, Amanda 🙂 I think my mom threw a party when I finally hit 5′. Gosh, genetics are a strange and wonderful thing!

  11. Thank you so much for sharing! My child is on the opposite end of the growth charts and it hurts my feelings when adults expect her to act at the level of a 6/7 year old and she’s only 4….then they question her intelligence. It is also bothersome when adults know her age and they talk about how “big” she is. I used to try to come back with an acknowledgement of her height and that was always shot down with a dismissal and a quick reference to being big. I love that children dont see physical appearance and I can only hope that it continues that way. She was already half my height at 2 and i have tried to turn the other way during the growth chart discussion. What a great topic for all sizes

    • Thank you so much for reading, Michelle! It has been so nice to hear from all the moms of “taller” children and how it affects them just the same. I think the bottom line is that it would be nice if no one would make comments at all regarding stature. That being said, I think it’s a good reminder for us all to see children as they see themselves – no flaws, not big, not small, just KIDS!

  12. What a fantastic post! This happens to us constantly. My daughter was born 12 weeks early weighing only 2 lbs so she has ALWAYS been small. She didn’t reach 20 lbs until she almost 2 years old. She’s about the same height as the other kids in her class but that’s probably because my husband is 6’1″ (I’m 5’4″). We are going next month for her 3 year well check, and there’s a small part of me that can’t wait to see where she falls on the growth chart. I never understand why people feel the need to point out to us how small she is or like a relative tells us constantly “she’s so skinny, does she eat anything?” You know, because I don’t stress out enough over the picky eater we have on our hands. What they don’t realize, though, is she has a lingering texture issue from being intubated while in the NICU. Like you, I pray she doesn’t hear those comments about her size.

    • Right, Elizabeth??? Totally in agreement with you. Everything that people say just stresses us out more – like we are oblivious to it? And wow, 12 weeks early! So glad she is doing well. Preemies are so amazing & strong. Thank you so much reading!! {My daughter had texture issues for a LONG time thanks her NICU stay and horrendous reflux. The good news is that now she’s 4, she’s starting to grow out of it, although she’s not a huge fan of milk still. Hope the same for you!}

  13. I can relate to this! My son was born 4 weeks early. Weighting 6 pounds 7 oz and 20 inches long, not small really for when he was born. He has always been an average size baby until now when he hit an enormous grow spur and he is about 90/90 percentile for height and weight at age two. But our story is not that simple. After a year of feeding issues and vomiting we discovered pyloric
    stenosis at age 1 and instead of surgery he had a dilation, which didn’t help. He fell from the 50 % to the 20 for weight and finally a couple of months ago the poor little guy had surgery. I hated hearing comments about his weight during that stressful time.

    Kids grow at different rates. My husband who now is 6’2 was always small and skinny. My mother in law even took him to the doctors who said he was going to be short. Well he hit puberty really late and well he is now tall. My sister in law was always small. Her cousin was huge compare to her. Now she is 5’8 and her cousing just 5’3. I was always a skinny little kid jaja and I am now 5’4 and probably hit that height at about 12. So really unless there is a hormonal or phisycal problem your kids at going to be anywhere between your height and your husbands. No more and probably no less. I had a friends that was hugeeee! Twice my size and now well she is just average. Fat kids are not healthy kids for gods sake! My future kids are probably going to be skinny like my husband and I were. And believe i was a great eater.

    Premies will catch up eventually and will be the size they were meant to be. Probably like mommie and daddy.

    • Agreed, Jessica! Genetics play a massive role and there’s not much we as parents can do about those genes! I hope and pray your little man is on the road to recovery and that the surgery was a huge success! Thanks for reading!

  14. Thank you so much for this post. My baby girl is 4.5 months old and she’s in the 5% range for height and weight. The pediatrician thinks she’s proportionately petite and following her own curve, but I’m a neurotic mommy – I hate the whole % thing. Obviously I want my little girl to be healthy, but why do we need to grade their stature? I hate getting on the scale period – I wouldn’t want to be compared to others my age – who cares? If my baby is meeting all her milestones (which she is), happy & healthy (which she is), then the whole percentile system can kiss my big butt, lol.

    Your twins are adorable! And I loved the other comments on here – I had no clue that we’re nit picking over like an inch?! That’s ridiculous. And I love the fun size comment – that’s perfection! Our fun size children rock!! 🙂 I’m 5’3″ so I’m calling myself fun size now.

    • That’s wonderful that you have such a supportive pedi, Jennifer. A lot of times the doctor can be a source of stress for parents, as you’ve seen in these comments! And I agree – we should all just go by “fun-size” now 😉 Thank you so much for commenting!

  15. I too can relate. And thank you for writing this. My 16 month old son was born 6 weeks premature at only 5lbs. He too was a heart baby. We spent over 3 weeks in the NICU for his heart and failure to thrive. The doctors wanted us to get him as big as we could for surgery, just like your little one. So I totally get obsessing over every little gain or loss. We celebrated every ounce gained! We never made the charts until a couple of months after his open heart surgery when he was 7 months. He is small and behind on all of his milestones, but he is full of life and happiness. People comment all the time on how small he is and for the longest time I felt obligated to justify to complete strangers on why he was so small. Not any more! He is who he is and who God wants him to be. Regardless of his size, he is a child of God and only wants to be loved.

    • Every ounce gained is HUGE, Teri! Your little man is a strong heart warrior and should rock his size and zip line with pride. And people need no justification – none of their business. Much love from one heart momma to another.

  16. I could have written this myself! My tiny girl is 23 lbs at 27 months old. She has steadily been in the 3rd percentile weight wise and I spent the first year of her life in the doctors every week while she was poked, prodded, and weighed. I went to every lactation consultant in town and took every supplement imaginable to boost my lack luster supply because I felt like I was to blame for her lack of weight gain. And I cried. A lot. Today she is a happy, active, smart as a whip toddler, who is tiny but fierce. Thank you for sharing your story! It’s nice to know I am not alone 🙂

    • You are most definitely not alone, Ashleigh! Love that this story {written completely off the cuff and when I was stark raving mad} has generated such positive commentary from moms of bigs and littles alike. I think the common thread is all of us moms are raising our kiddos as best as we know how – and a huge part of that is teaching them to ROCK exactly as God made them! Tiny & fierce is a great combo 😉

  17. I love that you wrote this! I can relate lol. I’m almost 30 and 4’10. I was picked on at school my entire childhood and I grew up hating that I was short! Even my teachers would embarrass me. Once I had 2 teachers one get me by my Hands and the other by my legs and they held me up and said we are pulling you so you grow! Traumatic for a 2nd-3rd grader. I have grown to love my height as an adult and accept the oh you are so cute comments lol. I worry about my 6 year old being picked on now. He’s in the 30% and his doctor says he will be petite but that he’s healthy and that’s all that matters. I already see some of his team mates comment on his height, he’s always the smallest on the team. He laughs and just says you are just very tall lol. I hope he keeps that same attitude as he grows up. I think it’s harder for males to be smaller in this society, but his height should NOT define him. I make sure he knows that with hard work and dedication he can be and do whatever he wants! Thanks again for the article!

    • OMG, Ali. I cannot even IMAGINE a teacher doing that!!! I’m so sorry that happened to you. What a positive attitude you and your son have – I love his comeback to his teammates! Thank you so much for taking the time to read and comment! {On a related note, I used to LOATHE the whole “cute” thing. I was like gosh, can I just be pretty one time and not “cute”??? hahaha. I think they wanted to put me in their pocket instead of date me. lol}

  18. YES. My five-month old twin girls have been in the third percentile for weight since day seven. It makes me batty-so batty that I find myself trying to fatten them up, even though the pediatrician is fine with where they are because they’re continuing to grow at a good rate. My singleton was always 75th or above, so I have a constant internal struggle. I wish there were different curves for multiples and breastfed babies (perhaps biased because I have both) so people didn’t freak the freak out when I tell them the girls’s place on the charts.

    • I’m with you, Lindsay! Hang in there. So glad your pediatrician is good with where they are. As long as they are growing and happy girls, you are doing your job, momma! {P.S. I started keeping the twins stats to myself instead of posting on my blog or telling people. I just didn’t need the additional commentary or stress. I was trying to keep myself sane with 2 at once!} Love our fellow twin moms! I’m sure your girls are precious and perfect! Sweet petites, as my friend would say…

  19. Oh man. My son is off the charts tall. When he was 2 people thought he was 4 and expected 4 year old skills. I wanted to scream ‘he isn’t mentally challenged! He is 2!’

  20. My son hight has even made me think about using growth hormones Because he is not even on the charts and when he is,its no more than 5% so you can just imagine the comments I get. What’s worse is that my son has to hear on a daily basis. He was born at 3.2 lbs and I was only 6 months pregnant. I was induced to give birth as both our lives were in danger if I continued with the pregnancy. My son is about to be 5 years old in 2 months and he is the size of an average 18 month old baby. He wears size 2 pants at almost age 5, so yes the comments on how TINY he is is now just getting very annoying. It’s hard to see that kids now don’t want to play with him because they call him a baby even though they are about the same age. My son has not realized the size difference yet but I’m sure he will soon as he came crying to me one day telling me that the kids were calling him a baby and he told me he was not a baby that he is 4 years old. So you can imagine how I feel and it breaks my heart. My son has had so many studies and test and everything comes out normal. Actually Doctors always come back telling me that he is extremely healthy that they never get kids with all the minerals and viatmins, blood counts and etc. coming out pretty much perfect and that he is healthier than any of them. The short gene is strong in my husbands family so it’s not a growth deficiency or anything of that sort. The comments got to me so much that I looked into growth hormones but I feel like the not knowing the true side effects are scary and so I has to put that into consideration. I’ve been told by parents that I should do it or else my son would be upset with me in the future for not doing it. I’m not going to do it as I feel it’s not normal to do that to our body. Right now I just pray to God that at whatever hight he ends up being when he is an adult that he can be just as happy as he is right now, I’m not going to lie but I do pray for my son to catch up with the other kids. I’m I am 5’5 and my husband is 5’4 my family is tall around 5’9-6’2 but I’m short and my husband has family starting in the 4’11 to the tallest 5’5. I will now defiantly pray that no one would make comments regarding stature.

  21. thank you! I just posted about this exact thing! Glad to know im not alone! My son will be 5 in April, and he is the size of a 4 year old
    Following is my post from WordPress:

    Tread lightly when speaking to a mama bear about her child’s life…

    ​I’ve debated on whether to share this as it is embarrassing to me… But a couple weekends ago, I had a big emotional breakdown. What spurred it on, im not entirely sure… Maybe it was lack of sleep… Maybe it’s the fact I bury my fears and feelings… However the case, Jon was there for me. He listened, he held me and he helped calm me back down when I wasnt sure if id ever stop sounding hysterical. The issue I have been dealing with is probably something many mother’s go through… “Am I doing something wrong?” “Am I not doing something I should be doing to help raise my kid?” There is so much pressure for us to be perfect parents… Social media doesnt help. In my case, I worry constantly about my son’s height and weight. As many know, he is on the small side. He has my height and his dads weight. People ask me “is there something wrong with him?” No, he eats me out of house and home. His size is due to genetics. Mine and his dad’s. I was short for my age and his dad was skinny for his age. I don’t STARVE my kid, he is on target for all of his developmental milestones. The kid has an active imagination and is such a good story teller. He gets bored easily, he has “perfectionist” tendencies… He is quite the artist and will work hard when he is in the mood… My son exhibits some “gifted” signs as well. Of course, I blame myself, thinking I am doing something wrong in raising him because he doesn’t always act like other kids his age… But, as Jon has reminded me of something I seemed to have forgotten along the way… My kid is happy and healthy and what others may say about my parenting style is fine, we all have our own styles. My kid is happy and healthy and that is all that matters. I dont judge people and their parenting styles, I expect them to do the same. It’s sad that it takes something like (me having an emotional breakdown) for me to speak up for myself. If you think my son is too small, then maybe your kid is too big? Like ive said, its genetics. He is not delayed in anything. He eats way more food then I do sometimes. This is what happens when people judge others… Even by making what seems like innocent comments… These add up and upset the person. If you have ever made a comment to a mother, even thinking you are helping… You really could be setting her up for severe anxiety and fear she is failing as a mother… So just be careful when you “impart age long wisdom” to a mother… You never know how she may take it and how it may affect her mentally…

  22. Thank you so much for writing this. I have twin boys born in July… I am from Texas and the boys are suppose to be big and mine are not… I have people point this out more than I care for and have struggled dealing with it.. I just want to hit them because my boys are so much more than just a number… it’s amplified because I am tall (5’10) and my husband is too.. (6’5).. ieveryone is shocked that our boys aren’t tall also… even though they just turned 2…. I am so glad you wrote this it makes me feel like I am not alone and crazy for wanting to punch everyone that mentions their size!!!

  23. My son is 7 and is a skinny little thing. His ribs show and his legs are tiny with knobby looking knees. He has no noticeable fat on him. His pediatrician has never seemed concerned. He’s 46lbs and 49”. The CDC website says he’s in the 2nd percentile for his age with a BMI of 13.5.

    I don’t know what to do, he seems healthy in other areas and does sort of eat (he’s still very picky). If the pediatrician seems okay…then I guess I should be too?

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