My little one just turned 2.5, and she still uses a pacifier. And I’m in no huge rush to break her of it either.
There I said it.
She’s gotten to the point where she only really uses the paci when she’s sleepy or going to sleep. But in an emergency situation – she NEEDS it. {Falling on the playground, upset about something, etc…} A few months ago, I noticed a few moms giving me “the look.” You know, the “Seriously. why is your kid using a paci?” look. I found myself making excuses for her like, “She missed her nap,” or “Her back molar is coming in,” or “She’s tall for her age, really only a young two.” I even worried about a photographer coming to my house at 6am to take pictures {for our before 8am series} and what if Daisy used the pacifier the entire time.
What would people think?
Seriously.
Why is this stupid piece of plastic causing me so much stress?! Why do I care? Then it hit me. I cared because it wasn’t about my kid. It was about me. What people thought of me letting my kid use it. Why I haven’t taken it away yet. Can’t I figure this out? Me. Me. Me.
Ouch.
When the humbling moment hit me, I decided to change the way I’m thinking about this. I mean, this is MY KID. She’s spunky, sweet, nice, and super funny. Like, she makes silly faces and voices and cracks us up. She’s well adjusted, super social, and the best little sister ever. So, why do I care about what other people think when it comes to the paci?? It’s not like she will be in high school with the darned thing!!
And before you start telling me how it messes up their teeth – well, yep, she has crooked teeth. Guess what? My grandma found a picture of ME at the same age and my teeth are FAR from perfect. And guess what else? I didn’t use a pacifier at all. Bad teeth just run in our family. {Note to self :: Start saving for orthodontics now.}
So when the timing is right, my sweet Daisy will be paci free forever. But that time is not now.
Oh, did I mention she also drags a blanket around too? Geesh… But, I guess that’s an entirely separate post.
{Photos courtesy of Karen Jacot Photography}
love this, Andrea! Such true words.
Thanks, Summer!! Humbling.. right?
My daughter (who turned 3 in November) has only been allowed to have a paci during naps and night time (and when she’s sick) since she was about a year old. We’ve been talking to her the last several months about giving up her paci all together because she’s getting too big to need one. About a month ago, without any prompting, she declared she was a big girl and didn’t need her paci when I was putting her to bed. So I praised her and took her pacies out of her room. She went to sleep and slept the whole night without asking for her paci. No tears or anything!! it’s been almost a month without the paci and no tears or requests for it at all (even with a 3 month old little brother who does have a paci)!
You’re doing a great job and know what your child needs and when. Don’t let the judgement of others ever make you feel less than! And by the way, my daughter still isn’t potty trained and I’m in no hurry to cross that bridge! Lol
I am playing up the “big girl” thing. She recently did give it to me when she saw a baby with the exact one she uses and said she’s a big girl and they are for babies. I was like.. .”yes!” Well, that was short lived, but at least a start! Thanks for the comment and support! And yes, get to do potty training soon too! fun!
Ahhhh freedom to just be one’s self. Beautiful!!
My baby girl turned 3 in December and she still has to have her blankie and paci! I don’t care one bit.
thanks for the comment!!
My daughter used a paci till about two and a half and my son till about 18 mos. They both decided when they were done with them. I don’t know what age my mom took my paci, but apparently i thought it was too early because sucked my thumb and then my pinkie till middle school, which is why i decided to let my kids decide when the time was right for them.
Google “Indigo Magic” The Pacie Pixie. This book and cd is the best tool to help break the paci habit!
My daughter is 26 months and still uses a paci. She only uses at naps and bedtime. She will not use it at daycare though. Her name is also Daisy!
My son is 4 and still uses his paci at nap and bedtime (yes, he still naps too)! I had a paci until around age 4. I also had braces twice and know it’s inevitable for him too. He’s getting his tonsils out soon, so I’m hoping maybe he won’t want his paci while his throat hurts…
My son stopped using his at 2. I never had set plans on when he had to stop using it. I figured he’d stop when he was ready. His stepdad was playing with him and pretended to throw it in the trash one day and that was it. He didn’t make a big fuss so we just decided not to give it back. He asked for it at nap and bedtime a few times after but we reminded him it was gone. He didn’t get upset about it so I guess he was ready and we didn’t know it! I have a 9 month old now and she uses one too. She will have it as long as she needs it.
both my daughter and son (ages now 4 and 2) had their pacifiers taken between 6-8 months. First, I don’t see anything wrong with a child holding on to a pacifier for as long as they need to. If it’s soothing or comfortable just go with it. Their teeth will be fine. I took my children’s pacifiers because they didn’t need them in my opinion. They never cried for them, they self soothed, they didn’t need them to go to sleep, they spit them out…so, I just got rid of them. Not all children are the same. I used to care about what others moms thought and really sometimes it is very comforting to know other moms feel like you, but at the end of the day, those are your children. The only other person’s opinion that matters is the hubs. I catch all sorts of flack cause I’m vegan and my kids are vegan. We’re good. We’re healthy and I personally believe my skin looks better than it has ever looked. I got that glow.
SO glad ditching the paci was so easy for you…. I agree, only opinion that matters is the Hubs. And, I love that you and your family are Vegan! Heck, that could be an entire blog post about how you make that work. Kudos.
My oldest used one until she was 3ish and we just let it go because it helped her cope with the world and she didn’t really use it much. We prepped her that the dentist would tell her she had to stop (and we told the dentist to tell her) but by 3 it was an informed intelligent choice for her not an unknown removal of her lovie. Waiting until she ‘got it’ made sense to us. Anyone who gave me a look I told that I would rather he have a nuk then some random thing from the ground in her mouth. I WISHED my other 2 used them for just that reason… Good luck and don’t stress.
Thanks Kate!
Andrea,
This is just what I needed. My little guy will be two in July and I have contemplated weaning him of his paci this summer. He also only uses them to sleep, in the car, or on other rare occasions. I guess just like every transition, we will make it when he’s ready.
I think you are right.. hopefully they will just wean naturally? (fingers crossed)