Several months ago, I was perusing Pinterest and came across a saying that really hit home for me. “Stop the glorification of busy.” These five words captured so many feelings I recently have had about this frenetic pace at which I’ve been running my life. Surely we aren’t intended to live such chaotic lives.
So, why do we glorify busy? If you’ve spoken to anyone in the past week and asked them how they are doing, their reply was probably something along the lines of, “Doing good, just busy.”
Busy…right. Yes, we are busy. We are in the throws of potty training, packing lunches, carpooling, attending birthday parties, trying to hold down full-time jobs, and rearing our children. We are busy. And it is exhausting. Anyone else tired of just being tired?
During a moment of weakness a few years ago, I found myself watching one of the “Housewives of You-Fill-in-the-Blank” shows on Bravo. Someone’s daughter had gone to Build-A-Bear and made a teddy bear for her mom. In the bear she inserted a little voice box that recorded something her mom often said. So, the mom gives the teddy bear a squeeze, and it says, “Can’t talk right now, I’m on a conference call.” That was the statement that her mom said so often, her child put it in a teddy bear. Sitting there that day, watching this garbage reality TV show, I had two thoughts. Thought number one – there was no way I ever wanted my kid saying this about me. And thought number two – am I seriously taking parenting advice from Bravo?
So, what does this saying actually mean to me, to stop the glorification of busy? It reminds me to stop thinking it’s actually a good thing to be busy. Because it’s really not a good thing. While I might have a full inbox and limited “me” time, there are plenty of things I’m not busy doing.
I’m not busy volunteering my time. I’m not busy picking up the phone and calling my best friend {instead of incessantly texting her}. I’m not busy visiting my elderly family members and listening to them replay stories of the good ole days. I’m not busy working out as often as I should. I’m not busy spending time in prayer and reading the Bible.
I’ve always been fascinated by those that practice the Sabbath {or Shabbat, as my Jewish friends call it}. In the Orthodox Jewish tradition, this means that from sundown on Friday to sundown on Saturday, they steer clear of anything that could be considered work – driving, technology, phones. This time is intended to be spent in fellowship with family, and in prayer and rest. The Sabbath is open to interpretation for each person, but how refreshing would it be to set aside a dedicated time each week where your sole focus was more about loving on people and less about worshipping at the altar of distraction?
We are a society that is addicted to distraction {especially the distraction of our iPhones…but that’s a whole other blog post}. Don’t we know that the one with the jam-packed, color-coded planner does not get a better seat in heaven? However, we continue to over schedule ourselves until our lives are spinning out of control and we just cannot keep up. No wonder we feel busy all the time. We are living our lives in fast forward. Sometimes, I’d just like to live in slow motion.
As a mom, I actually detest the word busy. It’s become my own four-letter word, if you will. If my toddler wants to play, and I’m occupied doing a chore, my husband tells him that Mommy is busy. During this moment, I visibly cringe. I never want my son to think I am too busy for him. What if he comes home in 10 years with a teddy bear and its voice box says, “Mommy is busy.” That’s not the mom I want him to remember.
It seems that regardless of our season of life – whether we are cuddling newborns, dealing with threenagers, or sending our littles off to school – we are busy. Let’s all do ourselves a favor, and stop the glorification of busy.
Everything in moderation. We can’t cut out busy either. Is mom so easily accessible she can ALWAYS stop what she’s doing to play? Surely growing up expecting your parents to always stop their adult-work for kid-play lends itself to the kids thinking that’s how it should be. But it cannot. Because we HAVE to potty train. We HAVE to work from home sometimes. To take 24 hours off is a great idea. But since your article says, “I never want my son to think I am too busy for him.” I am okay with my children thinking that; I want them to learn to entertain themselves lest I succumb to children-raising-parents.