Passionate About the Community
and the Moms Who Live Here

They’ll Judge You Anyway

Life is lived publicly these days. News and gossip used to be something that took a little while to make its way around town, but now, thanks to social media, the word spreads almost instantly. This can be good and bad. In happy moments it can be really good. I love stalking social media when a friend of mine is heading to the hospital to have a baby. Hearing the good news about the baby’s birth makes my day, and if I could like that first picture a million times, I totally would. In other times, the quick traveling news can be a little harder to swallow, but no matter what the news is, the fact remains that you, your group of friends, and possibly the whole world are all talking about it.

Everyone is talking about everything. That fact is a little overwhelming, but I’ve learned that it just is what it is. Albeit not a great human quality, observation and discussion {otherwise known as gossiping} are facts of life. We all do it, and we probably definitely shouldn’t — but we do. Everyone handles this new social media gossip train a little differently. Some choose not to post much about themselves and their family, some only post major life updates, and others, like myself, post quite often and enjoy interacting with others through social media each day. But no matter how often you post or what you post, it’s being talked about. Most of the talk is probably good, but sometimes the talk is probably downright rude. For example, “Did you see what so and so posted? I can’t believe she lets her child dress like that.” Again, a fact of life, right?

The question is how to handle the judgement. Do you stop sharing your life on social media? Do you not sign up for a good and bad business opportunity for fear of judgement? Do you not start a blog because of what other people will think? Do you not say what you think or ask for help because you know you’ll be the next subject of someone’s afternoon gossip session? Maybe, I guess, but I’m not going to.

After a lot of thought about these very things, I’ve decided that it doesn’t matter. They’ll judge you anyway.

  • If you decide to be a stay-at-home mom, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to be a working mom, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to leave your children in the care of your family, a nanny, or daycare, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to be a work-from-home mom, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to do direct sales for extra income, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to leave your husband or stay with your husband, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to start a family with same sex parents, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to adopt or foster children, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to utilize fertility treatments or a surrogate, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to throw big or small birthday parties, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you have a c-section, vaginal, all natural, or water birth, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to breastfeed or formula feed, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to start a blog, photography, or art business, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to get plastic surgery or embrace your mom bod, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to be a strict or laid back parent, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to send your kids to public school, private school, or homeschool, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to crib sleep or co-sleep, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to pick up your baby each time he cries or use the cry-it-out method, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to not to have another baby or to have ANOTHER baby, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to feed your children organic everything or fast food, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you use cloth diapers or disposable diapers, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you let your toddler walk around freely or put them on a tether, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you pierce your daughter’s ears or not, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you circumcise your son or not, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to have your baby wear an amber teething necklace or not, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to baby wear or always put your baby in a stroller, they’ll judge you anyway.
  • If you decide to wear — that dress, those shoes, that shirt — or paint your nails that color, they’ll judge you anyway.

Okay, so that’s a lot of judging going on, right? That’s exactly my point! And although social media may have added fuel to the gossip fire, this isn’t anything new. People are human, and it’s in our nature to discuss what we observe. So here’s the thing … since there’s not much you or I can do to change people and their natural instincts, we might as well do whatever we feel is right for ourselves and our family. Don’t worry about what anyone else will say, do, or think if you start a new adventure or post another selfie. Just do you. Be you. Be happy.

Your real friends, by the way, will always be there supporting you. Always. And if you don’t know who your real friends are just yet, wait it out and look around when you’re going through a hard time. See who’s there supporting you. Those are your real friends.

They'll Judge You Anyway | Houston Moms Blog

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