Remember the dancing scene in “Hope Floats”? Sandra Bullock’s character is shy and hesitant at first. Harry Connick Jr.’s character says “Dancing’s just a conversation between two people. Talk to me.” {Sidenote :: *swoon*}. They start off slowly, and by the end her head is thrown back and she is laughing with abandon as she moves with the music.
I grew up dancing, starting lessons when I was six. It has always been a passion for me. In college, I had a group of friends that I would go out two stepping with at least once a week {yes, that is the most Texas thing you have ever heard}. When I started dating my now husband, we decided to sign up for dance lessons together. We’ve danced on and off over the years, and while I had fun, I also found the activity grew our connection, and makes a good metaphor for other areas in our relationship.
Dancing is all about connection
To truly dance well with a partner, you have to know them. I’ve found that although I have danced with many people over the years, I dance best with my husband. We know each other well, and can anticipate what the other will do in most situations. Making eye contact, flirting with each other, and following the flow of each other’s movements is also hella romantic. Every time we dance, I am reminded of the special connection I have with my husband. This connection also helps us in other areas. Cooking together, going through the bedtime routine with our daughter, navigating to a new place. All are “dances” that are about communication and connection. Basically…marriage.
You might be bad at it, and that’s ok
I’ve had types of dances that I am really good at, and I’ve also taken classes where I just can’t seem to get it down. Even when we aren’t the best at it, I feel like my husband and I have still had fun together stumbling our way through a dance. It gives us a chance to laugh at ourselves, and learn something together. If nothing else, we bond over how terrible we are. In life we are never going to be good at everything. Sometimes you just have to laugh as you stumble through it.
You can learn from others
In most partner dance classes, the instructor encourages you to rotate partners. I think this is supposed to be helpful for those who want to meet new people and also evens it out for those who may have been stuck with a not so great partner at the beginning of class. I have observed some couples who come to classes who refuse to rotate partners, and I have always thought they were missing out. As an introvert, interacting semi-intimately with several strangers gives me the sweats, but I have always found it a beneficial part of classes. You get to experience a variety of skill levels and techniques before coming back to your original partner. In life, I think of this as a good reminder that our way is not the only way, and we can learn things from others that can improve our own partnership.
Practice makes perfect
One of my favorite memories from the time leading up to our wedding was practicing our first dance. We decided to semi-choreograph a two stepping dance to the Robert Earl Keen song “I’m Coming Home to You.” Although the cheers and accolades that we got on our wedding day after our dance were affirming, I will never forget practicing the steps together in our one bedroom apartment for the weeks leading up. Now I smile at the memory every time I hear that song. It’s a good reminder for me that the journey can be just as enjoyable {sometimes moreso} than the destination.
It’s a fun night out! Or in.
Going dancing is now on the rotation of date night activities for my husband and I. We like to visit Big Texas Dance Hall in Spring for the dancing, occasional concert, and excellent people watching. But even if you can’t get out of the house, make it a dancing night in! Push back the furniture, put on your favorite music, and go to town. Shake your groove thing. Dance like nobody’s watching. Get your kids involved if you want. Most importantly of all…have some fun!
