Dear Mom,
You got this. You know more than you realize. You are totally able to do this job. You are more than qualified. No one else is more uniquely equipped for today than you.
You know how I know?
You were the one that has been entrusted to raise this child. You.
And it doesn’t matter what path you were lead down to the title of motherhood, you are a mother. You waited and prayed and filled out paperwork and waited and prayed and drained your life savings and waited and prayed some more. And finally that child was named yours. And others, you carried that baby to the point of feeling like you might explode and somehow a real life person came out of you. That child with your eyes and his nose calls you Mom.
Those kids are yours. And you are theirs.
And they may not seem so jazzed about their choice today. And they may not be making it easy on you today. And time outs or groundings may seem to be doing nothing. The tantrums and the drama may make you seriously consider packing your bags and running away. The sleep training and missed curfews may leave you walking around with a fog, forgetting if you’ve brushed your teeth or put on deodorant.
And you maybe be wondering if you can do this. You can. You absolutely can.
Today might be a good day. Full of giggles and “I love you, Mom.” Full of cheerful waves as the bus pulls off and sweet lunch box notes. Full of sibling smiles and after school snack stories. Full of first steps and long naps. And you could be left breathlessly in awe that God gave them to you. That child is yours.
And the good is often as overwhelming as the hard.
Being a mom is a terrifying thing. It’s terribly joy filled, tear filled, fear filled, and hope filled.
And that fear that you might screw your kid up presses down on you like a weight you can’t push off. I think our only hope is that they will need less counseling than we needed. And that’s okay. They will be okay. Our kid’s strength is built in the unintentional bruising {figuratively speaking}. We have to let them fall. And it’s so hard to watch them struggle. But life is so much like those early years watching them learn to walk. We want so badly to catch them each moment before the crash, before the bruise. But strength and balance will come for them. And we are right next to them each step of the way, even when they are miles away in daycare longer than we wished or sitting next to that bully in science class or off for their first year of college.
I know they will be fine because I know one other thing about you :: they were loved. So very loved by you.
Us moms tend to just remember where we fell short, and we can hardly see what we’ve done well. We can count lists of all our failures in being their mom and struggle to think of the good.
Our society has given us a false perception of success in parenting. We think that the perfect kid and the Leave It to Beaver family is success. And no such thing exists. And it’s time we redefine that. It’s time for us to rewrite that. To live to a new standard – our standard. Your success in being a mom isn’t how your kid has never needed a time out or that they can recite their ABC’s at their 1st birthday or that they have the cutest boutique outfit. Your success as a mom isn’t in your kid’s home run or dance team officer position or honor roll standing or her figure. Your success as a mom isn’t that your kid is the good kid or the kid who got a scholarship to an ivy league school or even the kid who married the perfect girl.
Your success as a mom is right now. The way you love. The way you sacrifice for your kids each day without being a martyr. The way you juggle everything and laugh when the balls all drop. The way you stop and get lost in their profile. The way you believe in them and challenge them to dream bigger dreams than you had the courage to dream.
You see your kid doesn’t need anything else. They don’t need life to be perfect. They don’t need the best. They just need you, the perfect mom for them.
So go be you today. Trusting and knowing that you have been chosen for them.
{Do you know other moms who need to hear this? Share this message with them by clicking the social media icons below.}
