Jenn :: How I Became {And Am Becoming} A Mother

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Jenn’s Story

On May 23, 2012, as confetti danced down from the ceiling, Phillip Phillips seemed to cave under the weight of his accomplishments while singing his American Idol winning hit “Home,” and unable to finish the song, he left the stage and melted into the arms of his family, the arms of his mother.

On a chilly January morning 198-something, I surprised my parents with such a readiness to be born that they couldn’t make it to the planned hospital. There was no confetti, but I’m sure excitement just the same. {Right, Mom? You did mention that it was a cold but sunny day and something about angels singing.} That day I found myself in the arms of my mother.

At this point you are thinking, “Wait, isn’t this supposed to be a birth story?” Well, yes, we are getting there, but that story begins years ago {30+ to be exact}, and it continues hopefully far into our future. For me, being a mom isn’t a badge worn on my sleeves or another one of life’s hats to wear on my head. It’s woven into my heart, my innermost being. I’m so grateful to be posting on my own birthday because that January day is where motherhood began. I entered this world not knowing the plans God had for me, but in my heart I know that each breath and each moment molded me into the woman made to be “Momma” to two wonderful little boys and another on the way.  When Phillip Phillips sings, “I’m gonna make this place your home,” I feel so affirmed in what I’m meant to do here :: provide a world of comfort, encouragement, faith, and love for my children while away from their forever Home.

My story is one of faith through the struggle.

While I can’t tell you exactly when my husband and I decided we were ready to welcome children into our family, I can tell you that becoming parents, becoming a mother, took years for us.  Most days we dwelled within the positive. We found our grooves in our careers, took trips, occasionally drank a few too many margaritas, put on amazing Rock Band concerts within our apartment walls, and at the end of the day, grew in our friendship and love for each other. But there were dark times, times of doubt that having children was in God’s plan for us. We questioned ourselves, our world, our place in it. Yet through it all, our souls clung to the hope that wherever our family’s path led, it was where God safely wanted and needed us to be.

One October morning before what I learned is called the “Red River Shootout” and a friend’s birthday party later that evening, I took a pregnancy test just in case I shouldn’t be drinking, and you can imagine my surprise when that plus sign appeared. We took the classes, some amateur belly pics, and a few deep breaths along the way that this was really happening, all the while not knowing our baby’s gender.

I was induced at 40 weeks, and after failure to progress, delivered a healthy baby boy via emergency c-section in June.  Our Wyatt showed me what God had planned for me as a mother all along.

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My story is one of faith through the unexpected.

Again, I can’t tell you when we began trying for another baby, but again we found ourselves in a struggle.  After hearing encouraging thoughts about a natural approach to infertility, I looked into The Axelrad Clinic. I firmly believe that the treatment plan played a major role in becoming pregnant.  We surprised Daddy with the news one afternoon when he arrived home from work.

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Like most moms out there, I wondered what life would be like with more than one child and just how I’d have time to love on each of them enough to overflow their hearts. Little did I know how much their lives would change my heart. Our second son John suffered some respiratory complications  after birth and was brought immediately to the NICU. I saw him for a second before the nursing staff raced away, knowing something was off.

And there, stuck in my hospital bed after a c-section, as a mother unable to hold my son, unable to help my son, I felt our first-born son carry me through. Right beside the amazing man who stood strong for John and me, Wyatt’s love poured over me, and I know that love streamed directly from above. Unsure about the future, we traveled through those rocky days and nights and kept sights on God’s love and comfort for us, and my role as our sons’ Momma rang clear to me again. When our children face the unexpected, positive or negative, I pray my arms are their home.

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As it turns out, God had another trick up his sleeve.  On yet another college football Saturday, we received the most wonderful surprise with a positive pregnancy test. I’m not quite sure yet just how to be a mother to three sons, and I’m still in the elated but not yet panicked phase of this pregnancy; however, I’m confident that through good days and bad that, alongside my husband, I can be who they need me to be, and I believe that because that’s who He created me to be.

My story is one of faith through the becoming.

When I first learned about this beautiful and inspiring series, I couldn’t help but think of myself as in the process of becoming a Mother. Sure, the lines on pregnancy tests prove that I’m already there, as do my c-section scar and two boys waking up with smiley faces bright and early each day. But just as I believe I initially became a parent at a moment chosen not by me, I believe motherhood is a journey, one on which I am growing through successes and challenges.  The difficult days now will prove useful in later years when I will need even more patience, determination, and love to be the best version of Momma for these boys, and the smooth days provide the confidence and comfort that I am indeed along a path on which I do not walk alone.  I have indeed been given a gift and a calling to make this place “home.” May my answer be one that would make my own Mom proud!

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Please Note :: Bassett Baby Planning is graciously sponsoring our ‘How I Became a Mother Series’…and we would not have it any other way!  We are passionate about all that they are doing for new and expecting moms, and we encourage you to contact them to help in your journey to becoming a mother too.

To learn more about Bassett Baby Planning

or schedule an appointment, please contact ::

855.455.BABY or info {at} bassettbabyplanning {dot} com

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6 Responses to Jenn :: How I Became {And Am Becoming} A Mother

  1. Elizabeth January 23, 2014 at 7:34 am #

    Beautiful post, Jennifer. Hope you have a happy birthday and continued blessings throughout the remainder of your pregnancy.

  2. Chelsea January 23, 2014 at 10:21 am #

    Happy birthday Jenn!!! What a beautiful story. You are such an awesome writer and amazing momma. I’m so excited for you to be having a third boy. I also now have you to thank for getting “Home” stuck in my head the rest of the day. Luckily I love that song.

    • Jenn L January 26, 2014 at 9:30 pm #

      Ha Chelsea! I’ve been singing it for weeks now because of this post! Three boys will be so much fun, and I feel truly blessed!

  3. Jenn L January 23, 2014 at 12:51 pm #

    Thanks so much Elizabeth! We’ve got prayers going for a smooth pregnancy and any additional thoughts and prayers always help!

  4. Meg O. January 23, 2014 at 8:52 pm #

    First of all, HAPPY BIRTHDAY JENN! What a special day for you to be writing such a beautiful post. I think you are such a talented writer and have so eloquently put into words how much of a incredible journey motherhood is.

    • Jenn L January 26, 2014 at 9:32 pm #

      You are so sweet Meg! Thanks for the birthday wishes! I appreciated being scheduled to write the post this week too as the kiddos brought up some challenges. This was a gentle reminder to me of what a gift motherhood really is!

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