Girl Mom Dreams in a Boy Mom World

 

Girl Mom Dreams in a Boy Mom World | Houston Moms Blog

They are referred to as the G3, the boys, and the Vikingos {yes, my mom named them the Vikings in Spanish}. I am the mother to THREE boys, ages 11, 9 and 7. Hear me roar y’all, hear me roar!

The truth is that in my younger years, when I envisioned motherhood, I saw pink bows, cute Janie and Jack matching outfits, and ballet classes. There would be at least one little girl to be my shopping buddy, my Nutcracker ballet date, and my mother/daughter events companion. One day we’d have her bridal shower, we’d shop for her wedding dress, my husband would proudly walk her down the aisle and I’d watch her become a mother herself. Most importantly, I was also going to teach her to be fiercely independent and strong. To embrace education and to fight for goals and dreams. She would not be limited by the simple fact that she’s a girl. 

I had it all planned out until God sent me not one, but two, and then three rambunctious little boys to steal my heart.

Girl Mom Dreams in a Boy Mom World | Houston Moms Blog

Boy #1 that made me a momma. He’s taught me so much about patience, faith and perseverance.

Boymommin’ is not for the faint of heart! I’ve been peed on countless times, there have been several frogs held way too close to me, requests for reptiles as pets {no, the answer will always be NO}, and a new found love for all things parkour, which makes my nerves shot and my heart skip a beat. I’ve lived through the shock that boys discover their special appendage very early on and they don’t forget about it ever again! Yes buddy, you have a penis. Move on. 

We’ve had thousands of dollars worth of damage done to our house when a certain little boy left the upstairs bathroom faucets running and caused quite the chaos as water rained into our living room and kitchen, through the light fixtures and destroyed a good portion of the ceiling. Boymommin’ is never dull y’all. Never. We can thank the movie Home Alone for that one. Looking at you, Wet Bandits.

The truth is, for a long time I longed for that little girl. It was so hard to wrap my head around the fact that I’d never experience raising a daughter. With my third pregnancy, I remember lying on the ultrasound table and before the technician could even say a word, I saw it. I knew it was a boy and she confirmed it a few seconds later. I held my disappointment together and just broke down into ugly tears when I sat in the car. Don’t get me wrong. The blessing of a healthy baby was in there, but my dream of that little girl was shattered. 

I grew up caught in the middle of two cultures with very overprotective parents. There were many things that I wanted to do but was not allowed to do because it simply was something girls did not do in my parents’ culture. And I get it. My parents did the best they could with what they knew. But I felt very stifled growing up, so I vowed that I would never let my daughter believe that she was less than simply because she was a girl. I was not going to let her go through what I went through. I held on this belief that I would always support my own daughter in all she wanted to be. And then boom…1,2,3 boys.

Girl Mom Dreams in a Boy Mom World | Houston Moms Blog

Boy #2 on a date with his momma to his first Rockets game! He’s taught me so much about kindness, acceptance and just being cool.

So I wonder, is one’s experience of motherhood diminished because you only get to parent one gender? Are we missing out?

I don’t know the answer to that. 

What I do know is that now, 11 years into my boymomhood, I’ve come to realize that this gig is pretty cool, unique and a whole lot of fun! I also get the mani/pedi and fashion budget all to myself! But jokes aside, I feel God has entrusted my husband and I to raise these little boys into good men. It is a huge responsibility. I feel so silly now because when I look at my youngest son, I cannot imagine our family without him. He is incredibly witty, funny and full of SO MUCH JOY. I don’t need a daughter to be a supportive parent. Boys also need unconditional love, support and to be pushed to follow their dreams. Each boy has a unique personality and talent. They love all of their Houston sports teams and they tell everyone that mom loves JJ Watt. I will always be their biggest cheerleader, supporter and tough love giver. They give the best hugs and they still love to hold my hand…for now at least.

As a boy mom, I often get the looks and comments from strangers of “Aww, all boys…are you going to try for a girl”? I wonder if dads of all girls get the same looks and questions. Do they also feel a void because they didn’t get a boy? I have also gotten comments like, “Well, you have 3 healthy kids already so you should be grateful”, as if wanting that extra child makes you ungrateful. 

Girl Mom Dreams in a Boy Mom World | Houston Moms Blog

Boy #3…all sass, smiles and giggles. Pure JOY.

 The years have taught me that I do not need a daughter to redeem whatever it is I may have been holding onto, even though deep, deep, deep inside there might always be a little yearning for that baby girl. 

I’m all boymom though. I’ve lovingly and fully embraced my role in all of its potty humor glory! I absolutely love and treasure my boys. My biggest gifts. I could have never imagined 7 years ago when boy #3 was born that I would love being a boymom as much as I do. I am enjoying watching them grow into tweens and young men. Their brotherly bond is tight and I pray that it always remains that way. 

And I actually have taken all three of my boys to The Nutcracker ballet. And they thought it was cool. Sort of.


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One Response to Girl Mom Dreams in a Boy Mom World

  1. Avatar
    Christina January 28, 2019 at 8:13 am #

    And this is why people are disappointed when they don’t get the gender of the child they want. All of these things are things my GIRLS do! They’re rambunctious and wild and dirty and are little tornados of destruction. That’s because they haven’t been conditioned and socialized to be stereotypical “girls”. They play with all toys and wear all clothes (yes “boy” clothes too!) You think your kids shove frogs in your face because they are boys? My oldest stuck her arms up into a dead squid during a nature presentation and none of the little boys would even touch it. That’s because being gross or liking dolls has NOTHING to do with their genitalia and all to do with who they are innately and how we raise them. If people would quit having such a narrow view of what it is to be a girl or boy they’d save themselves the disappointment and allow their kids the freedom to express who they really are. And for the record, I also have a boy who is soft and gentle and who knows what he’ll grow up to like? But at least I know that if he likes play kitchens, babies or even the dreaded pink (yes even pink clothes) that’s just as fine as if he is into lizards and football – or both at the same time!

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