As my last postpartum visit nears, I am sad that I will no longer see my OB regularly. I started to feel this way shortly after delivery and also experienced the same thing with my first-born. I was surprised by these emotions. Nobody warned me about this!
I didn’t really think much about these wistful feelings because, really, what normal person actually wants to go to the doctor? But then my friend posted on social media that she was also feeling nostalgic about her routine OB visits now that her son was born. I further confirmed that members of our contributing team also felt this way after each pregnancy. So… Is this a thing?!
Turns out it is a thing. I thought about it, and it kind of makes sense why we have an emotional attachment to our OBs.
She has an equally great team who cares for you
It’s not just my OB who I’ll miss. I’ll miss the nurses, medical assistants, and other supporting team members. They were the ones who joined me in a victory dance with every good blood pressure reading. Not many people outside a clinical setting could celebrate those little victories like they could. They were a big part of the journey.
Her name is on your kid’s birth certificate
She’s the first one to hold my baby. She’s the one who declared what time my baby was born. And her name will be associated with my kids for the rest of their lives since her name comes before mine on their birth certificates.
She may have saved your life
If I were to guess, my OB would see each emergency surgery, prescription of meds to prevent bad things from happening, and order for lab tests to rule out worst case scenarios as routine duties. On the flip side, these events carry a considerable amount of weight in a patient’s life, and it’s hard not to think, “Hey, you saved my life. We’re besties now.”
It’s a long-term relationship
Being the mother of 2 under 2, I’ve been under my OB’s care for 2 years. I mean… Some people get engaged and married in that amount of time. Not in this case. All the anticipation doesn’t lead to a wedding. It leads to a break!
You might have seen her more than you saw your friends/family
I spent a bit of time at that office. There’s not many people I would wait 2.5 hours to see for 10 minutes. Plus, since I was on bedrest for the last trimester with my second-born, I saw my OB and her team more often than I saw friends and family. They became my tribe. I saw them every week, but with the arrival of my son, their job was done and those interactions came to an abrupt stop. It felt as if I had been dumped!
She’s pretty cool in real life too
OBs are real people too. Whenever I had the privilege of catching small glimpses into my OB’s personal life, it made her an even more amazing human being.
She’s a mnemonic for a time of great anticipation
I think the pregnancy/child birth experience has the same type of effect as other life events that have a period of mounting anticipation and excitement :: Christmas as a child, graduation, a wedding. After these occasions happen, we feel sad that it’s over. Now when we see Santa, a cap & gown, or a wedding dress, it may trigger some sort of nostalgia and keeps those feelings alive. In this case, my OB represents one of the happiest times in my life in anticipation for the arrival of my beloved daughter and precious son.
Having these feelings are a part of handling a transition in life. And with transition comes change. These fluffy feelings I have of my OB represent the calm before the storm of unknowns associated with that change… And change is hard! So when I go to my final postpartum appointment, I’ll enjoy the reminiscence of a happy time before settling back into reality.
Yes! I felt so sad about not getting to see my ob anymore after my daughters were born. They are 20 months apart, so I also had a lot of dr visits during a 2 year span. I figured it was related to baby blues and the change in hormones. 🙂 I definitely felt connected to my dr after her accompanying me through such significant events in my life. I think the change in routine was also hard when my babies were born and I went from weekly dr visits to the unpredictability/challenge of caring for a newborn. I will always remember her fondly!